A Precious Gift Page 20

  George laid his hand on Paula’s on the table. “Easy.”

  “She’s right, George,” Brian decided. “I’ve been blind. Most of all, I’ve been stupid. I married this wonderful, beautiful, intelligent woman, and I never took the time to really know her. I never delved into why she was afraid of the dark or why our security system was so important to her. I let her pick and choose what she wanted to tell me about her modeling career. I didn’t pry into past relationships. I should have done all those things. I should have cared enough to want to do all those things.”

  Paula pushed her juice away and sighed. “You’re a good man, Brian. You’re driven to succeed. You have a moral code that’s admirable, but if anyone falls short of your standards, you cut her from your life.”

  Paula was talking about his mother and holding up a mirror of how he’d self-righteously viewed the world. What had Lisa said about mothers? I don’t have one anymore and I wish I did. He had one, and he couldn’t be man enough to forgive her. Carrie had seen that. She had seen too much. She had seen his inflexibility, his desire to succeed, his lack of trust in her. She’d been right about that. He’d kept himself from becoming emotionally intimate because he was afraid she would leave. So what had he done? He’d driven her away.

  I want her back.

  He was as certain of that as he was that he needed air to breathe. He needed Carrie in his life. Life didn’t mean a damn thing without her. More than need, he loved her to the very bottom of his soul. He hadn’t told her that often, either. Yes, he’d told her that he wanted her, but not that he loved her. Now he wasn’t just going to have to tell her. He was going to have to show her.

  “I’ve got to go.” He pushed back his chair.

  “To Carrie?” George asked.

  “I have something I have to do first. But then, yes, I’m going to her. Somehow, I’m going to convince her to give me another chance.”

  When he stood, he told the Bradleys, “I promise you, no one means more to me than your daughter. Nothing means more to me than Carrie. I love her, and I’m going to spend the rest of my life proving it.”

  Paula stood, too, and there was encouragement on her face and a bit of a twinkle in her eye. “Before you go see her, you’d better shave and clean up a bit. You’ll scare her to death if you don’t.”

  Rubbing his hand over his beard stubble, glancing at his wrinkled shirt and his damp jeans, he nodded. “I’ll make sure I do that.”

  Then Paula hugged him, and George gave him a grin.

  Brian had found a family that had been waiting for him all along.

  The detective’s office was smaller than Everett would have expected. But at least it had a door that closed. Nancy was waiting outside. He’d simply told her there were a few things he wanted to ask the detective about the investigation man-to-man, and she’d accepted that.

  Now Levine asked him, “What did you want to talk to me about, Mr. Baker?”

  “About Nancy Allen’s suggestion that this is some kind of black-market operation. I don’t think anything could be farther from the truth.”

  “Why do you say that?” Levine casually leaned back in his chair.

  “Because Children’s Connection is an A-plus organization with no one but the best people running it. Besides that, you’ve got to understand the strain Nancy’s been under.”

  “Strain?”

  “She’s an E.R. nurse. Last night she’d worked a double shift. She does a lot of that, and she was exhausted when this kidnapping happened. It affected a close friend of hers, Carrie Summers. She’s overwrought with the repercussions and the heartache of it. I think you ought to take that into consideration in any statements she makes.”

  Levine studied Everett, and then made a note in the file on his desk. “All right. I’ll give your comments due consideration. Is there anything else we need to discuss?”

  Everett knew he had to be careful. If he came on too heavy, or undermined Nancy too much, Levine might get suspicious of him. “No. That’s it. I don’t want to take up any more of your time. I do hope you find the Sanders baby soon…for everybody’s sake.”

  Standing before the hotel room door, Brian knocked. He’d called Carrie from the lobby, gotten her room number and told her he was coming up. She hadn’t protested, and he hoped that was a good sign. When he’d returned from Carrie’s parents, there had been a phone message from Lisa, saying she was being discharged. She wanted to know what she should do. He’d known exactly what he should do. He’d told her to sit tight, and he’d be there as soon as he ran an errand.

  Now Lisa was waiting back at the house. He was hoping he’d be bringing his wife home to help console the teenager, to give her hope that Timothy would be found.

  When Carrie opened the door, it was easy to see she’d been crying. Even with her nose slightly red, and blue tinges under her eyes, she was the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen.

  She avoided his gaze, but said, “I called the hospital to see how Lisa was doing. They said you picked her up. Where is she?”

  “She’s home.”

  “Home?”

  “At our house, Carrie. At our house.”

  At that his wife’s gaze met his. “Is it still our house? We’re not together anymore—” Her voice caught, and she looked away again. “I can take Lisa home. To Mom and Dad’s. That way you don’t have to look after her.”

  “Stop writing the script for me, Carrie.” The firmness of his voice brought her gaze to his once more.

  She’d reserved a simple double room, instead of a suite. Now he took her arm and guided her to one of the beds, bringing his package along. “Sit,” he gently commanded.

  The way she looked at him almost broke his heart. It was a look full of despair and guilt and self-blame.

  Setting the package on the bed behind him, he turned to her and took her hands. “I think you’re the most remarkable woman I’ve ever met.”

  “Brian…”

  “Keep your eyes on mine, Carrie. I want you to hear every word of this and understand it.”

  When he was sure she wasn’t going to try to evade him again, he continued, “You’re remarkable because you’re a survivor. You’ve not only survived, but you’ve survived with courage and beauty and character.”

  Tears welled up in her eyes, and she shook her head. “I lied to you by not telling you. I never should have had the abortion.”

  “I talked to your mother this morning—and your dad—and they tell it a little differently. They told me your mom only gave you one choice. And you weren’t in any condition to think of another. First and foremost, Carrie, if we’re going to have the wonderful marriage I want us to have, you have to forgive yourself. What’s done is done. It’s in the past. You can’t undo it. But you can learn from it and help others because of it. You’re already doing that. You do it with the kids at the hospital, and you’re doing it with Lisa.”

  “I’ve carried this for so long.”

  “I know. It’s time to let go of it. I want you to let go of it and hold on to me.”

  Tears were falling down her cheeks now. “How can you forgive me? You want children. If Timothy isn’t found—”

  “I want you, Carrie. Maybe I was never clear enough about that. Maybe I never realized how completely I mean that. The night you were in your accident, I almost lost you. I came to several realizations then. One of them was that you had to be happy. I thought that making you happy meant giving you a huge house, unlimited charge cards, the raciest car in town. I haven’t been listening to you. I haven’t been listening to what you’re not saying, as well as what you do say. That’s going to change. I love you, Carrie Bradley Summers. You are my reason for living, and working, and building a future. Without you, none of it matters.”

  “Oh, Brian.”

  The way she said his name squeezed his heart. “Do you love me? Can you forgive the man I was and help teach me to be the man I want to be?”

  “I love you, Brian. Just the way y
ou are. I’ve merely wanted more of you.”

  “I know what that means now. I really do. We have to have time together to be together. And when we are together…” He put his arm around her and brought her close. “I want to know what you’re thinking and feeling. I want to know all the things you’ve never told me. I want to know your hopes and dreams and fears.”

  Turning her face to him, she whispered, “And I want to know yours.”

  When his lips met Carrie’s, the happiness inside him seemed much too unlimited to confine. He expressed it to her with every stroke of his tongue, with each beat of his heart, with every fervent taste of what true intimacy could be between them.

  When he broke away he said, “I have something for you.”

  “You’ve just given me everything I’ve ever wanted.”

  “Not yet.” He grinned. “But soon.” Then he put the package on her lap.

  He could see her fingers were trembling as she unwrapped it. He’d pulled some strings, but he’d managed to get the sketch framed.

  As she revealed it, she gasped. “It’s us. And it has your signature on it.”

  “I found out I can draw more than buildings when I put my heart into it.”

  She traced her fingers over the waterfall. Over their faces. Over his name. “Thank you. It’s the most wonderful gift I’ve ever received.”

  Brian took the framed sketch, laid it beside him and drew Carrie into his arms again. “You’re the most precious gift I’ve ever received. I love you, Carrie.”

  “I love you, too,” she whispered, then raised her face to his for another kiss.

  Epilogue

  The last day of January in Windsor, Oregon, was sunny and filled with promise in spite of the anguish in Carrie’s heart—in the past few days Timothy still had not been found.

  Every day, she, Brian and Lisa prayed that he would be returned soon. Carrie’s prayers felt true now, without the guilt she’d carried for so long, without the secrecy that had been tying her down. Brian’s unconditional acceptance and love had freed her and had allowed her to free herself. Now she felt ready to give herself to Brian—again. This time for a lifetime.

  Brilliant sun streamed through the stained glass windows as she stood at the back of the church with her father. This recommitment ceremony had been Brian’s idea. Now, as one of her favorite hymns played in the background, she looked down the chapel’s aisle to her husband.

  “Let’s go,” her dad murmured, giving her arm a squeeze.

  The ivory satin dress that she’d worn on their honeymoon was perfect for today. The fabric flowed around her as she walked down the aisle.

  Lisa, Carrie’s mom, dad and sisters, their husbands and children, as well as Leigh and Adam, were their special guests. Carrie hadn’t been able to reach Katie, and Nancy hadn’t been able to find anyone to cover for her on such short notice.

  As Carrie walked toward her husband, she could see the same emotion in his eyes that she was feeling. This time they were going to be united as one. This time they were going to give themselves completely to each other.

  Before they’d gotten dressed for the ceremony, Brian had told her he’d called his mother. She was flying in to visit them the following weekend. Carrie hoped for the best. She hoped for the best with everything now. They had discovered so much over the past month, they had found so much. She’d developed a new closeness with her parents and so had Brian. They’d become surrogate parents to Lisa. In a few weeks they’d be moving into the new house with her until she went to college in June. When Timothy Jacob was found—Carrie had to believe he would be—he’d add joy and light to their lives, too. They were surrounded by family and whatever happened in the future, they would be a family.

  With each step up the aisle—Carrie had told her dad to take his time—she counted her blessings. When she reached Brian and her dad put her hand in his, she smiled up at her husband, proud to be standing beside him.

  After the gray-haired reverend welcomed everyone to their recommitment ceremony, he said to Brian, “I understand you have something to say to Carrie.”

  Carrie’s father had taken her flowers for her mom to hold. Now as Brian took both of her hands, she gazed up into his eyes.

  “I, Brian Summers, take you, Carrie Bradley Summers, to be my wife. I vow to love, honor and cherish you each and every day. I promise I will be dependable, responsible, understanding and forgiving. I want to be your life partner, your friend, your confidant and your lover forever. To the best of my ability I will be your shelter, your home and your comfort. You are the best thing that ever happened to me, Carrie. Every day I will prove how much I appreciate that, how much I appreciate having you in my life. Today I pledge to you my trust with all my heart and soul.”

  The reverend glanced at Carrie.

  She took a deep breath and began, “Our journey has led us here to this place, and we realize and appreciate what we have. Your love is a gift. You are my love, Brian, and I vow to stand beside you, to support you, to encourage you, to compromise with you and to love you every day of our lives. You’ve accepted me for who I am, and I unconditionally accept you, too. I promise to always share my secrets and dreams with you, to trust you and respect you. My heart, soul and body are yours until the end of time.”

  The reverend looked out at the guests. “Since this couple has already exchanged rings, now they’d like to exchange something else. Carrie.”

  The reverend handed Carrie a masculine-looking gold watch. Taking Brian’s hand, she slipped the watch onto his wrist and clasped it. “Every minute that ticks by, know that my love for you grows stronger.” On the back of the watch Carrie had had inscribed, Beginning Again, Love Always, Carrie.

  Out of his pocket Brian took a delicate bracelet with a solid gold heart at its center. Taking her hand, he fastened it on her wrist. “Every time you look at this bracelet, know that my heart is yours.” He whispered in her ear, “It’s engraved with something really original—All My Love, Brian.” He caressed her cheek as he leaned away.

  The reverend was grinning. “Brian and Carrie have recommitted themselves to each other, and with my blessing, I hope you will also give them yours.”

  After he gave the blessing, he smiled and nodded.

  When Brian took Carrie into his arms, the reverend, the church and their guests all faded away. She was his and he was hers.

  Forever.

  Special thanks and acknowledgment are given to Karen Rose Smith for her contribution to the LOGAN’S LEGACY series.

  ISBN: 978-1-4268-6524-4

  A PRECIOUS GIFT

  Copyright © 2004 by Harlequin Books S.A.

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  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events or locales is entirely coincidental.

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